I’ve been working hard at really trying to listen to God’s voice.
I’m not good at this.
Seriously. I know that God can speak any way he wants. I know it’s not confined to me sitting by myself with a journal in a meditative-y sort of mood. I know God speaks through people, through nature, through the experience of driving on a busy highway. But I also know I need there to be times of silence in solitude, and I need to ask the question “what are you saying?” And I need to keep my mind quieted for the answer.
Did I mention? I am not good at this.
God, how can I serve you and really love other people today?
(ouch my foot hurts. wonder if that’s from…. wait, I didn’t actually DO anything yesterday to my foot. Wow I was such a slug, actually. I really need to get into the habit of exercising. Did I remember to send that permission slip to school? Dang it. I forgot to talk to so-and-so about what we’re going to do for communion 3 Sundays from now. I really wish someone else could make those arrangements now and then. It would be so great to have a couple of Sundays off. What kind of job would I want if I didn’t have this one? But no, wait, I know… this was a ‘calling’. I can’t ignore that. God called me to….ohhh no… )
God, I’m so sorry! I don’t know how you can stand it! Please help me listen to you and quiet my own frantic voice! ugh……
This is what happens when I attempt to really tune in to what God might be saying. Over and over. So every day I try to put my own whirly brain-voice in the ‘time out chair’ to allow God’s voice to be heard. I know from experience that when I stick with this, it gets easier over time. I am more tuned in to what God is saying and what He’s doing throughout the day. Just like any discipline, it’s this first stage that is killer.
So I’m sticking it out and I’m forcing myself to quiet down. And I’m listening. Perhaps I’ll tell you sometime what I hear….