A bit of a thematically epic day, yesterday.  So much so that I’m compelled to blog again.

SUNDAY MORNING Week 3 of our ‘Because‘ series. 
This week…  ‘We sacrifice because Jesus sacrificed’.
The international day of prayer for the persecuted church was a week ago, but we wanted to turn our attention to this issue in a worship service that would best feature it, so we did it this week.  We also shared communion this week (an every-other-month observance for us).  Each of these parts speaks strongly to the theme of sacrifice, so we wove them all together with a few songs and a series of readings created by our pastor.  It was a more somber worship experience than we are used to, but the content called for this treatment.

Opening Song “Unashamed Love” (Ten Shekel Shirt) We’ve done this song for several years, and it remains an effective favorite.

The Persecuted Church Reading: Sacrifice… the persecuted church (link to all 3 readings)
Prayer “In Christ Alone” (Getty)
Lord’s Supper
Reading: Sacrifice… the Lord’s Supper
“Carried to the Table“  (Leeland) performed by a vocal ensemble, 2 acoustics, piano, and cello. Stunning. Guitar instrumental.
Offering: “God Leads Us Along” performed by same ensemble and instruments.
Our Call Reading: Sacrifice… our call
Message: We Sacrifice

SUNDAY EVENING We hosted a celebration event for our denomination’s missions group. It’s hard to explain adequately, but there is some AMAZING work being done around the world through this ministry.  The evening was focused on what is happening in the country of Turkey, where officially there is religious freedom, but in reality not so much.  Without anyone orchestrating it, we heard stories that directly illustrated our worship service themes from the morning. We heard about Christians who have been killed for their beliefs, but whose deaths resulted in hundreds of people being exposed to God’s message of truth. Because we don’t usually have Sunday evening events, these things are not often well-attended.  But many more people came than have come in the past. All had the opportunity to hear about God’s work… all were invited to consider participating in some way in this work… and all were invited to worship together and celebrate the God we serve. ‘Glory to God Forever‘ (Fee) ‘Come Thou Fount Come Thou King‘ (Gateway Worship) opening comments & intro to the situation in Turkey DVD story of Turkish believers stories and challenges prayer for God’s work offering ‘Carrier‘ (Anderson) ‘Mighty to Save‘ (Laura Story arr.) ‘How Great is Our God/How Great Thou Art‘ (Tomlin) ‘Glory to God Forever’ Because there were other churches invited to this event, we tried to incorporate songs that would be familiar to most attenders. We opened with ‘Glory to God Forever’ as people were finding their seats, and the invited them to sing it with us at the end of the evening.  ‘Carrier’ is my very favorite missional song at the moment… because it is new, most people didn’t sing along with it, but it could easily be learned by a congregation. Without question, ‘How Great is Our God’ was the powerful corporate worship moment of the night. Long day.  Good day.

This post is a part of Sunday Setlists.  Check em’ out!

What? Pornography is only a problem for guys, right? Right? As it turns out…. no, not so much. Today I write to bring attention to Dirty Girls Ministries, a Christian anti-pornography ministry created to help women who struggle with pornography addiction. The mission of Dirty Girls Ministries is to…

• Bring awareness to the porn problem among women today
• Show struggling women they are not alone
• Demonstrate hope for recovery from this addiction
• Explain that the Bible and Jesus have the answer

These things are accomplished through online recovery groups, coaching networks, resources, and prayer support. Dirty Girls Ministries was founded by  Crystal Renaud in February 2009. After ‘meeting’ Crystal through the blog and twitter world a few years ago, I was finally able to meet her in person this summer as she generously spent an evening with our family.  I saw in person what I had already seen online… a talented, honest, God-chasing woman who is taking every opportunity she can to serve God and others through her gifts and experiences. Crystal launched a website survey earlier this year to try to find out the scope of this issue. Within weeks, she had received over 300 surveys from women across the nation proving not only can women be porn addicts, but that they are in desperate need of help.

Dirty Girls Ministries is for real. The need for this ministry is real. So take a moment… check it out… and start talking about it.

Attend college grad parties for students we also saw graduate from high school. And junior high.
Attend weddings of former youth group students.
See former youth group students become amazing parents.
See our kids become friends with children of former youth group students.
See shy fourth graders grow up to be vivacious college students.
See former campers be counselors for my own kids.
Attend the baptisms, graduations, and weddings of all the kids in a family.
Act as references for students who are applying for involvement in innovative ministries.
See former ministry team members become amazing leaders of their own minstries.
Follow the thread of gifting through a student’s life, and seeing that gifting blossom into real action.  

So, do I think staying in one ministry for a long time is easy? No.  Do I think it’s required? No. But do I think it’s good and valuable, yes. Absolutely.

Kem Meyer is the Director of Communications at Granger Community Church in South Bend, Indiana.   I’ve been following her blog for a while;  it has become a source of great insight for creating clean, uncluttered communication within a church.

Kem has now written a book: Less Clutter, Less Noise

True to the title, this book leads the reader through clean discussions about communication purposes, priorities, methods, and myths. In the freshest way possible, it brings clarity to how an organization like the church can most effectively communicate to those it serves. Today, Kem is on a blog tour.  Twenty-six bloggers submitted questions to Kem, she replied to the questions, and each blogger is posting their conversation.  This allows a wide audience of readers to learn more about this idea of less clutter, less noise.  Plus, each tour stop will give away a copy of the book to one lucky reader.

My brief q & a with Kem:                                                                                                         
KIM: As I read your examples of Granger Community Church’s communication policies and practices, it’s apparent that both the method of communication (medium) and what is being communicated (content) strive to be uncluttered.  To me, this indicates an overall mindset of simplicity regarding what actually happens as a part of GCC ministry, not just how things are communicated.  How did this mindset come to be a part of the DNA of the leadership of the church?

KEM:  Kim, you’re right. It’s part of the leadership DNA. Mark Beeson set the stage when he planted our church 22 years ago with GCC’s mission statement “Helping people take their next steps toward Christ…together.” Since that time, he has led from the front with the wisdom of deliberate simplicity…communicating over and over that people experience life change one step at a time. As the church grew, more ministries evolved outside of Mark’s individual scope. So, he raised up leaders and empowered them in their roles to protect and extend the mission, to create systems that help the parts see what the whole is doing. People are busy, skeptical, bombarded and life is hard. They’re looking for answers that make a real difference in their lives. The value we provide grows in direct proportion to how easily people can find and say yes to their next step

Did you see that idea of  ’helping the parts see what the whole is doing’? This is gold.   As a bonus, Kem includes a ‘Back of the Book’ section with examples of GCC’s policies & communications processes.  A super bonus leads to a free download of the entire GCC Communications Manual which I highly recommend.

Read more of Kem’s blog tour. Learn more about Less Clutter, Less Noise Find examples of GCC’s communications forms & processes  

June 1 edit: the winner of a free copy of Less Clutter, Less Noise (randomly chosen from those comments posted prior to 9am CST today)  is Larry Baxter.  Congrats Larry!

It was a great experience; it was the best thing I’ve attended during my 9 years of in worship ministry.  Read about that experience here.  I knew I had to go back this year, and I knew Neil had to go with me.

So we’re spending the week in Nashville with a group of 150 or so other worship arts leaders.  It made the most sense for us to drive, so we’ve made our way across several states over the past couple of days.  We missed the Super Bowl to do this.  

I know. There were zero little smokies for us.

I briefly considered a small crockpot in the back seat.

As Neil said, there are about 12 layers of goodness around this week.   He’s on vacation from work for a week.  He and I get to spend the week together.  We get to spend the week learning to know some great people.  In a great city.  Eating great food.  And all of that is in addition to the actual content of the conference, some of which we know about, and some of which is a surprise.  It’s part of the magic of re:create.  It’s part think-tank, part rest, part resourcing, part inspiration, all creative. 

Hopefully I will be able to write about it a bit throughout the week.  Many others will be writing as well.  If you follow me on twitter or facebook, you’ll see a flurry of updates I’m sure.  

I’m thankful for a church leadership that values these kinds of experiences for staff. I’m grateful for Neil’s week of vacation.  And I’m in awe of the fact that my mom is living in our house this week to take care of our kids.  

Oh, and I’m grateful you all got to eat your little smokies.  Really.

A few months after our pastor came on staff he told us about a tradition he wanted to bring to our church from his former ministry: an all-church reception held each January.  The event was to be planned, executed, paid for, and hosted by the staff of the church.  The purpose of the event: to thank the church for being a great church.  The first time I heard this idea, there was a part of me that crumbled in tears.  What a great way to show our church family that we see them, we hear them, and we are healing along with them.  What a beautiful leadership idea… something that is completely and truly motivated out of a desire to express gratitude and love for our congregation.

“Do they know that you love them?” 

The part of me that didn’t crumble in tears was distracted by the details of the proposed plan. This reception was to feature a specific homemade food item that we, the staff, would prepare together beginning at noon on a Sunday, with the reception beginning at 5pm that evening.  So this was to be a whole-day affair, involving all staff families helping in the kitchen and setting up the auditorium for the reception.  Excellent. The food item?  New Year’s Cookies.  Wha????

New Years Cookies are not cookies. They are like donuts, but without holes.  They are like fritters, but round instead of flat.  They are…  extreeemely good, and extreeemely a once-a-year indulgence. Unlike many others in our church, this food item was never a part of my family’s tradition.  My only experience with New Years Cookies has been this event, when we make close to 2000 of them to share with our church family.  This day goes something like this:

The first time we did this, people came and people came and people came.  I remember the gratitude they expressed as we mingled throughout the room trying to express our gratitude to them.  I remember people being almost humbled by the fact we would do something like this.  

This was now our fourth year of the New Year Cookie event.  We have more staff families now, which adds to the fun.  We estimate 450 people came, which is about half our weekend worship attendance.  We don’t have very many ‘all-church’ events throughout the year, and this is a very easy, relaxed evening…  no programming… just come, eat, drink coffee… hang out.  It seems like all ages of people love eating these things. Most adults set a limit of the number of cookies they’ll eat, but many will cave when we start bringing trays to their tables, offering more.  I believe the consumption record is held by a high school guy who ate 22 last year.  I don’t even want to know what his next day looked like.

Every year I will love the chance to pour coffee for my church family and tell them ‘thank you’ just for being a great church. Every year I will enjoy the afternoon spent with staff families, frying, glazing, setting up tables… despite the fact that it usually turns into a 12 hour day.  And every year I, with a few others on staff, will probably continue to roll my eyes when it comes time to put ‘grease ball day’ on the calendar. Sort of like how older kids roll their eyes when their mom gets all emotional about everyone being together.  We know it’s a good, valuable thing, but we can’t help giving our pastor a hard time about it. After all, it’s a day spent making dough balls cooked in grease.   But it is one way we show our church family that we love them.  And it is good.

A few months after our pastor came on staff he told us about a tradition he wanted to bring to our church from his former ministry: an all-church reception held each January.  The event was to be planned, executed, paid for, and hosted by the staff of the church.  The purpose of the event: to thank the church for being a great church. 

The first time I heard this idea, there was a part of me that crumbled in tears.  What a great way to show our church family that we see them, we hear them, and we are healing along with them.  What a beautiful leadership idea… something that is completely and truly motivated out of a desire to express gratitude and love for our congregation.

“Do they know that you love them?” 

The part of me that didn’t crumble in tears was distracted by the details of the proposed plan.  This reception was to feature a specific homemade food item that we, the staff, would prepare together beginning at noon on a Sunday, with the reception beginning at 5pm that evening.  So this was to be a whole-day affair, involving all staff families helping in the kitchen and setting up the auditorium for the reception.  Excellent.

The food item?  New Year’s Cookies.  Wha????

New Years Cookies are not cookies. They are like donuts, but without holes.  They are like fritters, but round instead of flat.  They are…  extreeemely good, and extreeemely a once-a-year indulgence.  Unlike many others in our church, this food item was never a part of my family’s tradition.  My only experience with New Years Cookies has been this event, when we make close to 2000 of them to share with our church family.  This day goes something like this:
  

The first time we did this, people came and people came and people came.  I remember the gratitude they expressed as we mingled throughout the room trying to express our gratitude to them.  I remember people being almost humbled by the fact we would do something like this.  

This was now our fourth year of the New Year Cookie event.  We have more staff families now, which adds to the fun.  We estimate 450 people came, which is about half our weekend worship attendance.  We don’t have very many ‘all-church’ events throughout the year, and this is a very easy, relaxed evening…  no programming… just come, eat, drink coffee… hang out.  It seems like all ages of people love eating these things. Most adults set a limit of the number of cookies they’ll eat, but many will cave when we start bringing trays to their tables, offering more.  I believe the consumption record is held by a high school guy who ate 22 last year.  I don’t even want to know what his next day looked like.

Every year I will love the chance to pour coffee for my church family and tell them ‘thank you’ just for being a great church. Every year I will enjoy the afternoon spent with staff families, frying, glazing, setting up tables… despite the fact that it usually turns into a 12 hour day.  And every year I, with a few others on staff, will probably continue to roll my eyes when it comes time to put ‘grease ball day’ on the calendar.  Sort of like how older kids roll their eyes when their mom gets all emotional about everyone being together.  We know it’s a good, valuable thing, but we can’t help giving our pastor a hard time about it. After all, it’s a day spent making dough balls cooked in grease.  

But it is one way we show our church family that we love them.  And it is good.

“Do they know that you love them?” 

Do they–the people of this church–know that you–the leaders of this church–love and care for them? My immediate inner response? “Are they supposed to?” Which was quickly followed by a careening set of “ohmygosh I’m so messed up of course they should know that because it should be true and we should be showing them and there should be no question.”

This little 14-thought-pile-up happened inside a person who had walked through several years of church conflict, some of which was personal and some of which was not.  In an environment where survival seemed to be the only goal, ministry was motivated by a tangle of obligation and passion and intention and accidental discovery.  I was aware of two realities at work: the reality that God was still sustaining and caring for His church, and the reality that my inner conversation was peppered with cynicism and hopelessness.  

“Do they know that you love them?”

I was surprised at how foreign this thought was for me. I don’t think it had occurred to me to intentionally make an effort to express to the people I lead that I actually love them.  What did occur to me was just how much of a messy leader I had become. Had I taken on bad leadership practices? Had I failed to take on good ones? Why in the world was God keeping me around in such a state?

I still can’t figure out that last question, but I know that as a result of being ‘kept around’,  I am being taught by great leaders. Books and blogs about leadership are helpful, but my perspective has been permanently changed for the better by experienced leaders looking me in the eye while displaying and teaching godly leadership in a million different situations.

“Do they know that you love them?”

I’m going to write a bit this week about how I see great leaders expressing their love and appreciation to those they lead.  Stick around. It doesn’t always look like what you’d expect!

He knew some of the recent history of our church… the conflict, confusion, and frustration … the plateau in our momentum & health… so he asked us very direct questions.  He asked our opinions of what had happened.  He asked how we were doing.  He asked us how we thought the people of the church were doing.  And then he asked this:

“Do they know that you love them?” 

Do they–the people of this church–know that you–the leaders of this church–love and care for them?

My immediate inner response? “Are they supposed to?”

Which was quickly followed by a careening set of “ohmygosh I’m so messed up of course they should know that because it should be true and we should be showing them and there should be no question.”

This little 14-thought-pile-up happened inside a person who had walked through several years of church conflict, some of which was personal and some of which was not.  In an environment where survival seemed to be the only goal, ministry was motivated by a tangle of obligation and passion and intention and accidental discovery.  I was aware of two realities at work: the reality that God was still sustaining and caring for His church, and the reality that my inner conversation was peppered with cynicism and hopelessness.  

“Do they know that you love them?”

I was surprised at how foreign this thought was for me. I don’t think it had occurred to me to intentionally make an effort to express to the people I lead that I actually love them.  What did occur to me was just how much of a messy leader I had become. Had I taken on bad leadership practices? Had I failed to take on good ones? Why in the world was God keeping me around in such a state?

I still can’t figure out that last question, but I know that as a result of being ‘kept around’,  I am being taught by great leaders. Books and blogs about leadership are helpful, but my perspective has been permanently changed for the better by experienced leaders looking me in the eye while displaying and teaching godly leadership in a million different situations.

“Do they know that you love them?”

I’m going to write a bit this week about how I see great leaders expressing their love and appreciation to those they lead.  Stick around. It doesn’t always look like what you’d expect!

When you train up a child to appreciate Garage Band.

(more pics below) Set lists.

Our friend Brian and his pink guitar.  And the pink mic that somehow materialized.

Hallie ‘studying’ during rehearsals.

Hallie wearing her shoes……   and Hallie wearing MY shoes.

Hallie makin’ her daddy proud by choosing to take this picture.

the room… full…

the band… full…

… in action…

the contrast that makes us laugh…

Kim’s potential wardrobe malfunction.  See the trouble? (yes, I spent a full EIGHTEEN DOLLARS on those Koss earbuds. Which is almost exactly like spending at least $100 on the really good ones. No amount of money would have prevented me from wrapping those bad boys around the hoops, however)

Hallie + point & shoot + digital zoom + low light = 

fun at free time… down town boutique…..

And finally… every parent knows that you must capitalize on the teachable moments as they come. So this is me training up the child to be sure to avoid…..

….the poo pouring out of the building on day 3 of the event. Blech.

The end.